Friday, January 11, 2013

Dating Keli

I heard a country song yesterday where the man met a woman at a social event and said to her "let's get out of here and go for a drive" ...That man singing GOT it... I am starting to wonder if some of the people in the mid-singles of the DC area get it... I feel like they are happy and content hanging out at social events and would rather go to endless activities or be with "the group"  than to pair off...

It recently came to my attention that a woman in the Potomac Ward made a CLOSED group for mid-singles that want fun activities on Facebook to go too.... because she "wanted to get to know people" um... I don't get why she can't get to know people IN PERSON..

I am against this closed group and these are my reasons why..

1. it is a CLOSED GROUP... we are LDS.. we are not for secret societies.. if you want to invite a lot of people to something then YOU SEND AN EVITE.. or YOU TEXT THEM.. or you ASK THEM.. or you FB MESSAGE THEM... but you DON'T MAKE A CLOSED GROUP... like we are going to this activity BUT ONLY IF YOU CAN SEE IT... ridiculous..

2. several mid-singles suffer with depression and feelings of low self-worth.. that is why I am not putting the identifying stuff of this group.. imagine how they would feel or do feel that they are not a part of this group..that is not right... like I invited ALL THIRTY people in this CLOSED group.. but not YOU.. since you are not in it..

3. One of my friends said " at least she was invited to the group" because her roommate had to ASK to join.. wow.. just WOW... I mean who WANTS to be in it...I mean seriously.. I would not stoop so low to ASK or to confirm that I want to be in it like no thanks..

Here are a couple of stories to illustrate my point
1. I have planned lots of outings and then put them on the Oak Marr list serve or other list serves and have got MINIMAL response.. I even once had one guy SHOW UP and then when he saw that there were no "cool people" there.. just me and two other people.. he said is THIS ALL THAT IS GOING...we said yes.. he said.. well then I am not going... so I stopped wasting my time putting stuff on the list serve... and started just asking my friends and then contacting other people.. to see if they wanted to go on my outings.. over the summer.. I planned an event and texted and messaged several people.. and then one girl.. tried to TAKE OVER and said to me a bunch of stuff like "why did you not invite EVERYONE" and "why did I not post this on "friends of the Oak Marr FB page" I said I have done that in the past.. and got not much response.. and she said "well I think that you need too"

THIS PERSON IS IN THIS CLOSED GROUP!!!!!! she had the NERVE in SUMMER 2012 to tell ME to invite EVERYONE...and to post it on the OAK MARR FB PAGE... yet.. is POSTING STUFF IN THIS CLOSED GROUP ALL THE TIME... no she did NOT.. like for real no she did not... like OK so it is NOT ok for me to ask people in my life to go somewhere with me.. and not post it( which I DID end up doing) in summer 2012 but in fall/winter 2012/13 it os OK for YOU to post in this CLOSED group.. that you are doing this and that..wow.. just WOW.. I really would like to confront her.. but this will suffice... because I feel like if I did she would just INVITE me to the group...like NO... I don't think so...

another person told me that he went to a movie night with this closed group.. and there was no where to sit and he had to " sit on the hard floor" then another person told me about the same movie night and she said that there were too many people there and that this one guy texted her early into the movie night and told her to come because there was " no one cool there yet" WHAT.. how old is he?...does he WORK?? is everyone "cool" at his job.. does he go to the movie THEATER... I sat by a large woman with a cane that was KNITTING at the Twilight movie and I did not think at all.. " wow I wish I was sitting by someone COOL" OH MY WOW... just WOW...

Then she said that the TV was not a flat screen and not big enough for everyone that was there.. which IMO is just EMBARRASSING I would not invite people over for a movie.. if I did not have room for them.. and if I had a crappy TV.. that is just WAY too embarrassing..esp. if I had a big bulky TV in  late 2012.. no.. don't think so.. even my MOM has a FLAT SCREEN...

THEN she said that one guy leaned over and said to her.. " I feel like I am twenty-three years old at BYU... " and she said I know right..

I said to the guy that said he had to sit on the hard floor..and to this woman .. YOU ALL STAYED.. you all had no PROBLEM STAYING THERE.. and watching this movie... and if that guy that said he felt like he was twenty-three at BYU...well he drove from MD... and he is HOT...you can't TELL me he could not find a date.. but he would rather sit and feel like he is back at BYU.. I guess if that is all he did at BYU for social and that is what he is still doing.. then.. um.. no wonder he is not married...

so how I know about these things is that people are telling me.. and it makes me SICK... like I believe in DATING I believe in MARRIAGE.. I believe in people graduating from the singles ward and moving ON.. I believe in REAL FRIENDSHIPS...

I love my real friends and I hope that they love me.. I really do.. and they have been there for me through a lot of stuff.. and I have friends of all ages, sizes, and religions.. and I am so grateful for them.. and I don't worry if they are cool.. or any of that stuff and they don't worry about that either...

Having the skills to form REAL FRIENDSHIPS with people that REALLY CARE ABOUT ME.. is essential I feel like to one day having a REAL relationship with a man that becomes my husband.. and I am glad hat I learned those skills awhile ago..

I heard that one of those girls posted in that closed group that people are going to do something on Sunday in the nice weather...I said that sounds great..but you know what would be better.. if she thought..there is a great guy I would like to get to know I should ask him to do this with me.. or just text her friends.. and say let's go do this...

I am all for a group...but not like this...


 

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