dating Keli

A couple of weeks ago, Julian and I went to the Reston Library in Reston, VA... I had all my hair back in a headband and a ponytail and barely any make-up on. I was wearing
a pair of jeans
gold flats
a Utah State shirt
a dark yellow sweatshirt

I am telling you all this because someone asked me out there.. at the library..

so I am walking around and looking at books trying to decide that to check out..and Julian gets into this man's satchel thing you know those things that are not purses and are not briefcases that men carry.. I was like "omgosh I am so sorry.. but we are stalking you"...the guy was like "that is OK"

I said are you a lawyer.. he said no that he was an investigator.. and that he was that guy that went around and did background checks for people that got clearances..

I said that was cool.. that I did not have a security clearance because I had a record and that might prevent me from getting one.. I said I dated someone crazy that accused me of a bunch of stuff..but oh well that is over now..

then I said I guess I should not have told you all that and not even told you my name I am Keli, he told me his name was Dan and then asked me out to dinner...

REMINDER I told this guy I had a criminal record AND I had baby Julian with me...Julian is only 16 months old so if I am divorced or never got married to his daddy...well I guarentee you I have DRAMA in my life..

I told him Julian was not mine I was his nanny... and that I could go.. he picked a place and told me to google it...it had three dollar bill signs beside it.. I was like dang.. I will be living large.. I have not gone to a three dollar bill place since..Justin.. my b-day in June was only a two dollar bill place....

so we exchanged numbers and I said he could add me on FB.. he said he did not have a FB........................I just don't even KNOW anymore... I really, REALLY don't know... come on..

when I checked out my books I told the ladies at the library that someone had asked me out.. they said "with a toddler in tow??" I said yes he seemed nice..

so when I got home I had to google him the old fashioned way.. and found out he was 31 and has a condo in Reston..

I kinda had a freak out.. like I forgot what it was even LIKE to like a guy with no FB... like um... how do I know ANYTHING about you...? I mean am I actually supposed to TALK to you... I just don't know... ahahahha

so then he calls me a couple of days later and starts talking and tells me these things
1. his favorite thing in life is buffalo wings..............gross
2. he has never thought about getting a FB....come on NEVER ...never thought about it..
3. that the last girl he dated he met at Whole Foods in Vienna when he was there looking for organic chapstick.. he said he was "walking up and down the aisles" looking for it..COME ON.. that is ridiculous.. he could not go to CVS and get some Burt's Bee's he had to go to WHOLE FOODS.. and I KNOW the layout of Whole Foods you do not need to ROAM THE AISLES to find chapstick.. I mean did he think it would be in the dairy section..
4. that he goes to the library to do work because he would not do it if he we were at home.. he would just do nothing...
........I personally think that he goes to places like the library and Whole Foods to pick up women..
5. He then said that he broke up with the last girl because he is Jewish.. he had already told me that but it did not seem that important to him..well it is because he broke up with that girl because she is not Jewish and did not want to convert..I said............well I am NEVER ever going to convert to being a Jew.. I have already converted to this religion.. and I have been through hell with it.. so I am for sure staying... He said that he did not know about our date then...

I was starting to not know about it either.. because he was talking like we were super serious like about meeting my family.. and all this stuff we would do together...like um....................I am sorry WHAT...

He said that I shoulld understand that the Jew's went through a LOT with the holocost...and I should understand that because of that there are not many Jew's left because theh Holocaoust decimated the Jew's he asked me if I felt that there were not that many Jews left... He said he feels that there are not many Jew's left and what he wants to do is re-populate the world with Jewish people........WAIT.. WHAT? He asked me how old I was I said 37..He said Oh.. I thought you were in your 20's I guess he thought I had more re-populating years left.
.....I said that I was not going to be able to help him re-populate the world with Jew's.
He said he could impress me.. because he knew that
1. Mitt Romney is a Mormon
2. that Mormon's like to be called LDS
3. Napoleon Dynamite was made by Mormons...
wow that is some extensive knowledge next thing you know he will tell us that David Archuleta is or something...

so I said that he should try and date a Jewish girl he said that the Jewish girls don't like him because he owns a condo in Reston and not a single family home in McLean or Great Falls and that he is not a lawyer or rich..

I said that I did not feel right about him taking me to a restaurant that had 3 $ bill sign's by it .. since it was just going to be as friends.. so I said let's go somewhere a little cheaper.. he said OK let's go to Taco Bell... I said a LITTLE cheaper...
I ordered three things off the menu PLUS a speciality drink..the date itself was not horrendous...
BUT I don't think we are looking to go the same direction in basically ANY WAY..so we said goodbye...
maybe Julian and I will see him at the library sometime...